Gay guide to Kota Kinabalu in Sabah, Malaysia

We were proud of this little find. Our local gay friend took us here. You have to enter a “secret” door that no tourist or guidebook would know about, which made us feel quite special. As such, you know it's going to be quite a safe space for local gays to hang out. Once inside it was super pretty. Their best nights are on weekends when they have live music bands performing. TIP: this is a “cashless” bar, card payments only!

D'Atas is located on the 1st Floor of Tong Hing Supermarket, 55, Jalan Gaya, Pusat Bandar and is open daily until around midnight.

Tapai Speakeasy is frequently rated as one of the best bars in KK as well as a popular hangout for local gay guys. It's quite upmarket, trendy and hip. The mixologists are extremely talented, serving up some of the best cocktails in all of KK. We can definitely attest to that and would recommend a visit just to try them…the Gin-ger Martini one of our personal favourites! Tip: look out for the pretty generous Monday-Friday Happy Hour offers before 8pm.

Tapai is located at 117, Jalan Gaya, Pusat Bandar Kota Kinabalu, 88000 Kota Kinabalu. It is open Monday to Saturday from 4pm until 2am.

The Sunset Bar is one of the most romantic places in KK. It's part of the Shangri-La Tanjung Aru hotel who have their own private spot on a peninsular just outside the city. It's a west-facing open-air bar geared towards maximising your sunset viewing experience! They also serve the most extraordinary drinks such as their “Beergarita” – a colossal Margarita served/flavoured with two beer bottles inside it, which is announced with a loud dramatic gong by the bar staff!

The Sunset Bar is located at the end of Shangri-La's Sunset Beach (address is: No. 20 Jalan Aru Kota Kinabalu, Sabah, Kota Kinabalu 88100). It is open daily from 4-9pm.

If you like seafood, this is one of the best places to come for it in KK. It's also very local, which we loved – we were one of the few foreigners here when our local friend Ken brought us here. In terms of food, you select the seafood you want from the water tank as you enter, then they cook it for you. It's that fresh! I had the steamed grouper fish which was my standout memory. For Seby it was the Kam Hiong Clams and the Wet Butter Tiger Prawns, both of which are the most popular signature dishes at Welcome Seafood. FYI Kam Hiong is a type of sauce which you can buy to take away with you to use back at home.

This unassuming hotel is popular with locals for its excellent Cantonese food. It's located on the 2nd floor of the Winner Hotel (at 9 & 10 Jalan Pasar Bary, Kg Air) and it gets so popular that unless you call and reserve a table beforehand, you'll wait a long time! Our favourite dish was the ‘drunken chicken' – ie cooked with lots of rice wine, and the signature dish – Steamed Pork with Salted Fish. The chefs are mainly ex-pats from Hong Kong who are trained to make authentic “Hakka” dishes. HIGHLY recommended by us for the best and most authentic Chinese Malay dining experience!

Nagisa is the Hyatt's in-house gem of a restaurant and it's bloody good! If you're craving tasty sashimi or sushi, then make sure you come here! It's not only a thing amongst locals, but it was also voted twice by the Malaysian Tatler as one of the best Japanese restaurants in the whole country. The food is fresh and so well cooked. Just order a platter of sushi and dive right in is our advice! FYI – their signature dish is the Nagisa Maki, but to be honest, everything we tried left us feeling satisfied, particularly sushi/sashimi, the mixed tempura and the green tea ice cream for dessert.

There are several islands near Kota Kinabalu, particularly: Gaya, Sapi, Manukan, Mamutik and Sulug. You can easily visit them as a day trip and arrange tickets yourself from the main port in the town centre.

Sapi island is the most popular with an area for snorkelling and a fun zip line ride linking it to nearby Gaya island. Sapi island also has an excellent secluded beach to get away from the crowds. One of the best ways we recommend to experience the tropical waters of KK is on a snorkelling adventure tour around the islands.

Mount Kinabalu is one of the main draws of the Sabah region of Malaysia. It is a World Heritage-listed site and at 4,095m (13,435 ft) high, the highest mountain in the country. Note that you cannot do this independently and must book a Mount Kinabalu tour, which is usually a 3-day adventure. Tours will usually include all meals, guide, climbing permit, 2 overnight stays, one at a local guesthouse like the Laban Rata Resthouse, the second at the Poring Hot Springs. The key to it is ensuring you acclimatise to the altitude safely – remember Kota Kinabalu starts at sea level! The big highlight is watching the sunrise over Mount Kinabalu. This happens on Day 2, which is when you summit the mountain.

Divers will love KK! The Tunku Abdul Rahman Marine National Park (locally called the TAR Park) is right on your doorstep. It's a marine paradise here, part of the Coral Triangle with almost 50 dive sites to check out. The sites mainly comprise sloping coral reef and sand from 2m (6.5ft) to 30m (98ft) depth. It's the perfect place for beginnings starting out to try a few fun dives or even get their PADI Open Water. Experienced divers will also enjoy it. As well as lots of tropical fish, you can also expect to spot barracudas, snappers, turtles, rays and even a few blacktip reef sharks. There are many different packages for scuba diving, really depending on how much time you have. The best value is to do a 3-dive scuba diving tour with a reputable diving company like Borneo Dream.

The Mari-Mari Cultural Village is located around 30 minutes outside of Kota Kinabalu. It is an excellent way to learn about the culture and lifestyle of the indigenous ethnic communities of Borneo. We did a half-day tour of the Mari Mari Cultural Village and learnt how they used to live at a time when electricity had not yet been invented. For example, they showed us how their ancestors used blowpipes to hunt or how they produced fire to cook.

We also got to try bamboo cooking, rice-wine making (and drinking!), tattooing and much more. It was a rewarding and extremely insightful insight into Borneo's cultural heritage, which we recommend you try out.

The orangutans are native to Borneo and a must-see highlight for any visitor here. It was one of the first things we wanted to see. You can, of course, see them up close in a rehabilitation centre like the Sepilok Orangutan Rehabilitation Centre. Better yet is to spot them in the wild.

We spent a few days at the gay owned Last Frontier Resort along the Kinabatangan River (the second longest river in Malaysia) where many orangutans live in the wild. Every morning we'd see them climbing above us during our jungle trails – absolutely incredible! Read more about it in our detailed review of the Last Frontier Resort.