Is Brunei safe for gay travelers?

Brunei – the tiny, oil-rich country nestled on the island of Borneo. It’s got lush rainforests, stunning mosques, and more gold than Elton John's wardrobe. But, when it comes to LGBTQ+ rights, let’s just say… the rainbow here has a few clouds hanging around.

So, is Brunei safe for gay travelers? Brunei isn’t exactly the first place that comes to mind when figuring out where your stilettos can safely strut next – and for good reason! Brunei might not be rolling out the rainbow carpet anytime soon, but that doesn’t mean it’s completely off-limits.

Before you start panic-packing your camouflage couture collection, let’s break it down. Brunei is a deeply conservative Islamic country. In 2019, it made global headlines when it introduced Sharia law, which included some pretty terrifying penalties for same-sex relationships. But wait – before you cancel your flights and delete your Grindr, there's more to the story.

On our first trip together to Borneo, we deliberately skipped visiting Brunei out of fear of its harsh anti-gay laws. However, I later visited solo during a long layover from my trip to Seoul and Hokkaido in Japan. I also wanted to visit Brunei as part of my quest to visit every country in the world (Brunei was my #101 country).

My verdict? Yes, it's strict, yes you have to be cautious, but I had a surprisingly enjoyable experience. The food is delicious, the people are welcoming, the water village is an impressive feat to explore, and, most surprisingly, there's a pretty resilient LGBTQ community living and thriving in the sultanate, albeit with some complexities!

So, prepare for take-off as I guide you through the ins and outs of gay travel in Brunei, including where to stay, what to do, practical safety tips, and other invaluable advice for LGBTQ travelers.

Why visit Brunei?

Why visit Brunei? I get it, it's not exactly screaming “gaycation paradise”, but hear me out. Beyond the conservative laws and the absence of any nightlife (let alone anything remotely queer), there’s actually a lot to love about this tiny sultanate.

For starters, Brunei is loaded, and it shows. The sheer opulence of places like the Sultan Omar Ali Saifuddien Mosque is enough to make your jaw drop. Imagine gold domes so shiny they could outshine RuPaul's wardrobe. Then there’s Kampong Ayer, a water village where life happens entirely on stilts. It’s like Venice, but with more speedboats and way fewer influencers.

The Ulu Temburong National Park is a lush, untouched rainforest where you can channel your inner Tarzan on canopy walkways high above the jungle. Plus, you might just spot a proboscis monkey that’s got a nose so big it’s basically the Cher farewell tour of noses.

And of course, the food. Brunei’s night markets are a delicious assault on the senses, especially Gadong. Think sizzling satay, rich beef rendang, and sweet treats that should probably come with a dentist’s warning. It’s cheap, it’s tasty, and yes, I ate way too much…

Is it legal to be gay in Brunei?

Well, let’s just say Brunei isn’t exactly rolling out the rainbow carpet. Being gay here is, unfortunately, very illegal. In 2019, Brunei made headlines worldwide when it introduced strict Sharia laws that include death by stoning for having gay sexual relations. Yes, you read that right! But before you gasp too hard, it’s important to know that strong international backlash led the Sultan to declare a moratorium on the death penalty…at least for now. 

In reality, these laws are rarely enforced, and most LGBTQ+ locals live under a “don't ask, don't tell” kind of vibe. But make no mistake, Brunei is a deeply conservative country, and public displays of affection (between both gay and straight people) are a big no-no. If you’re planning to visit, discretion is key. Avoid all PDAs, and definitely no rainbow flag selfies in front of the mosque!

Is it safe to be openly gay in Brunei?

In short? Absolutely not. Strutting around Brunei waving a rainbow flag is about as safe as swimming with sharks while wearing a meat suit. The country’s strict Sharia laws make being openly gay not just risky, but downright dangerous. While enforcement isn’t common, the fear of repercussions keeps the local LGBTQ+ community living under the radar. This is why we rate it as one of the most dangerous places in the world for gay people.

That said, Brunei is not a place where people will chase you down the street for wearing a pink shirt. It’s a reserved culture where public displays of affection, gay or straight, are frowned upon. 

So, if you’re planning to visit, keep things discreet. No lingering eye contact, no flirty winks, and definitely no spontaneous Britney dance-offs in the middle of the street (tempting, I know).

Bottom line: blend in, stay smart, and remember, this isn’t the place to make a statement, but rather to experience the culture respectfully and safely.

So is Brunei safe for gay travelers?!

Well, on paper, nope! Brunei’s laws are some of the harshest in the world when it comes to LGBTQ+ rights, and you’d think stepping off the plane in fabulous attire would land you in hot water. But here’s the twist: my experience was actually… fine!

I blended in, kept things low-key, and to my surprise, found the people to be generally polite and welcoming. Hotel staff didn’t so much as blink at two men sharing a room (and overnight guests? Not an issue!), and at no point did I feel unsafe. Brunei’s culture thrives on discretion, and as long as you respect that, you can explore the country without any trouble.

Grindr worked surprisingly well in Brunei, and thanks to it, I was able to connect with the local LGBTQ+ community effortlessly. It turns out, beneath the country’s conservative exterior, there’s a discreet but thriving network of queer locals who know how to navigate life here with style and caution.

Are there any gay bars or clubs in Brunei?

Short answer? Absolutely not. Brunei is a dry country: no alcohol. Nightlife in Brunei is pretty much non-existent – there are no clubs and bars here at all. So, if you were hoping for a fabulous night out with cocktails and a killer playlist, think again. Interestingly, even shisha cafés are a no-go, as smoking is generally frowned upon.

The best social hangouts in Brunei are the bustling night markets, where you can feast on local delicacies, and the cozy cafés that serve as the go-to spots for catching up with friends. If you find yourself feeling peckish at 3 am, Restoran Semporna Enak is a reliable option, one of the few late-night spots that stay open.

For those craving a livelier scene, the locals have a clever solution: drive over the border to Miri, a city in Malaysia’s Sarawak region of Borneo. Just a few hours away, Miri offers everything Brunei lacks: bars, clubs, and yes, even alcohol. It’s the perfect escape for anyone looking to let their hair down…discreetly, of course. Read more in our Malaysia gay travel guide.

Are there any gay friendly hotels in Brunei?

Brunei may not be draped in rainbow flags, but when it comes to hotels, a discreet and professional approach is the norm. 

I stayed at the Al Afiah Hotel. They had no issues at all. The staff were polite, professional, and didn’t blink twice at two men sharing a room. Plus, it’s clean, comfortable, and located conveniently close to the city’s main attractions. They were able to arrange airport pick up and tours to the Kampong Ayer water village and Ulu Temburong National Park. The rooms are simple, but it’s a good option for those traveling on a medium or low budget.

For something more upmarket and gay friendly I was recommended the Radisson Hotel Brunei Darussalam by local gay Bruneians guys I met. As an international brand, the Radisson is more accustomed to diverse travelers so staff are openminded. Rooms here are more plush than at Al Afiah.

What are the top things to do in Brunei?

Brunei might not scream adventure at first glance, but trust me, there’s plenty to see and do. From golden mosques to floating villages and lush rainforests, here are some of the top things I got up to…without breaking any laws… hopefully!

Water Village (Kampong Ayer)

Welcome to the Venice of the East, but with more speedboats and fewer gondolas. Kampong Ayer is the world’s largest water village, packed with stilt houses, schools, and even mosques—all floating above the river. It’s fascinating to see life unfold here, and honestly, I was just relieved none of the houses sank while I was visiting.

Omar Ali Saifuddien Mosque

Built in the 1950s and named after the father of the current Sultan, this mosque is pure opulence. Surrounded by an artificial lagoon, it looks like something straight out of a fairy tale, minus the talking animals. At night, the grounds come alive with locals and an illuminated fountain, which makes for some seriously Instagrammable moments, especially at sunset.

Brunei Museum

Ever wanted to see cannons carved to look like dragons and crocodiles? Well, here’s your chance. The Brunei Museum is home to these ornate bedil cannons, and let me tell you, if looks could kill, these things would definitely do the job.

Royal Regalia Museum

Brunei doesn’t do subtle, and the Royal Regalia Museum proves it. Think gold, jewels, and displays of wealth that would make even a Kardashian blush. My Lonely Planet guidebook gave it a ‘must-see’ star, but honestly, I’d give it five, purely for the over-the-top, look-how-rich-I-am energy.

Ulu Temburong National Park Day Trip

The Ulu Temburong National Park is a pristine rainforest that’s untouched, untamed, and totally Instagram-worthy. The best time to visit? Sunrise or sunset, when the jungle feels straight out of a nature documentary. Just don’t expect Wi-Fi, this place is as wild as it gets, and let’s be honest, your inbox can wait! 

What are the top foods to try in Brunei?

Food in Brunei is simple, delicious, and often leaves you wondering, why haven’t I been eating this my whole life? It’s similar to Malay food and reminded us a lot of the best foods we tried in Malaysia. Here are a few must-try dishes that had me going back for seconds (and thirds, but who’s counting?). 

• Ambuyat: Brunei’s national dish and quite possibly the stickiest thing I’ve ever put in my mouth (and that’s saying something). Made from sago starch and water, it’s basically an edible glue that you twirl around a bamboo fork and dip into a variety of tasty sauces. It’s a choice…
• Nasi Katok: steamed rice, crispy fried chicken, and a fiery sambal sauce that packs a punch. It’s cheap, cheerful, and available everywhere. This is the kind of meal you’ll want after a long day of sightseeing.
• Kelupis: sticky rice wrapped in leaves and steamed to perfection. It’s coconutty, it’s chewy, and it’s the kind of snack that sneaks up on you. Before you know it, you’ve eaten five. 
• Pulut Panggang: grilled sticky rice stuffed with spiced fillings, all wrapped up in a banana leaf. The smokiness gives it that extra oomph, and honestly, I could eat these all day long.
• Teh Tarik: Brunei’s answer to a latte, but way better. It’s sweet, milky, and ‘pulled’ to create the perfect frothy top. Watching the vendor pour it from a mile-high distance is half the fun. Drinking it is the other.
• Kickapoo: putting this in only because the name had me CRYING with laughter, perhaps more than it should… It’s a local Malay citrus ‘Joy Juice’. To me it tastes like Fanta, but the hours of fun I had over the name…

Is it moral for gay travelers to visit Brunei?

Ah, the age-old travel dilemma: should we visit countries with anti-LGBTQ+ laws? Brunei’s track record on gay rights is, to put it mildly, not cute. Knowing that, some might argue that spending money here is indirectly supporting a regime that doesn't exactly roll out the rainbow carpet. Trust me, I get it. But as someone who’s actually been to Brunei, I think it’s a bit more complicated than just a simple yes or no.

For starters, boycotting a country doesn’t magically change its policies overnight. What it does do is create further isolation for the LGBTQ+ locals who live there every day. 

During my visit, I met some incredible queer Bruneians who, despite the legal restrictions, have found ways to live their lives with resilience and hope. They were more than happy to see LGBTQ+ travelers visiting. If anything, it made them feel a little less alone in a world that often tells them they don’t belong.

That said, visiting Brunei doesn’t mean throwing a Pride parade down the main street. It’s about being mindful, respectful, and using the experience to learn more about life under such restrictions. If we only ever traveled to places that perfectly aligned with our values, our world would get a whole lot smaller.

So, should you visit Brunei? That’s your call. But for me, travel has always been about connecting with LGBTQ locals, and sometimes, the most meaningful ones happen in the most unexpected places.

Out of respect to the request for anonymity by my local LGBTQ+ friends in Brunei I’ve deliberately not shared any of our photos together. So, you’re stuck with just snaps of my mug…

Our safety tips for gay travelers to Brunei

Here’s a rundown of all the essential safety tips to keep in mind for your trip to Brunei, based on our firsthand experience traveling here as a gay couple. For even more crucial insights, be sure to check out our detailed Gay Travel Page.

1. Don’t post online before or during your trip: in Brunei, it’s best to hold off on the Insta stories until you’re safely back home. Broadcasting your location might attract unwanted attention, and trust me, this isn’t the place you want to go viral.

2. Be prepared to jump back in the closet: keep conversations neutral, avoid bringing up LGBTQ+ topics, and maybe swap out that rainbow phone case for something a little less… extra.

3. Avoid all PDAs: no hand-holding, no sneaky kisses, and definitely no public displays of affection. Brunei is deeply conservative, and even straight couples keep it G-rated in public. 

4. Caution when using Grindr: Yes, Grindr works here, but that doesn’t mean you should go tapping away without caution. Be mindful of fake accounts and insist on a video call to verify their identity and/or check their social media channels. We’ve published this guide to staying safe while using gay dating apps.

5. Consider using a VPN: another essential tool for staying anonymous and secure online in Brunei is a VPN. By encrypting your data, a VPN ensures that your internet activity remains private, preventing your ISP from monitoring or tracking your online movements.

Stay safe online!

Make sure you organize a VPN before your trip to ensure all your online activities stay private. Whether you want to post photos or connect with gay locals on grindr or scruff, a VPN makes sure nobody can see what you're up to and make life difficult for you, no matter where in the world you may be.

Plan your trip to Brunei

Ready to explore Brunei? Whether you're going for the stunning mosques, floating villages, or just to satisfy your curiosity, a little planning goes a long way. Here’s everything you need to know to make your trip as smooth as possible.

How to get to Brunei

Brunei’s main gateway is Brunei International Airport (BWN) in Bandar Seri Begawan. Direct flights are available from major hubs like Singapore, Kuala Lumpur, and Bangkok, making it relatively easy to reach. If you're already in Borneo, you can also cross overland from Malaysia’s Sarawak region. Just be prepared for some thorough border checks.

Get a SIM card when you arrive

Wi-Fi can be spotty, and you don’t want to rely on hotel connections alone. Grab a local SIM card at the airport for reliable data. Trust me, it’ll come in handy when you're navigating or Googling best satay near me.

How to get to the city from the airport

Getting into town from Brunei International Airport is pretty straightforward. There’s a public bus stop just outside the airport: hop on the Franchise Bus, and you’ll be in the city in about 30 minutes (though factor in some waiting time because buses here run on their schedule, not yours). If you’re short on time like I was, we recommend organizing a private transfer ahead of time, which takes only 10–15 minutes to reach the city center.

Visa requirements

Most tourists get a free 90-day visa on arrival, but double check your country’s foreign office advice for the latest info. When I visited, I completed the e-arrival declaration form in advance to avoid filling in a landing card on arrival. I recommend doing this as it will massively speed up immigration.

Best time to visit

Brunei is hot and humid year-round, but the best time to visit is during the dry season from January to May when you’re less likely to get caught in torrential downpours. Avoid Ramadan if you can, as things tend to really slow down: no music, no eating in public during the day, and an overall quieter vibe.

Getting around

Public transport? Practically non-existent. Your best bet is using the Dart Rider app, Brunei’s version of Uber, or renting a car. Taxis are available but can be pricey and hard to find but your hotel should be able to arrange this for you easily.

Where to stay

For a comfortable and hassle-free stay, I recommend Al Afiah Hotel—great service, central location, and no awkward looks at check-in. If you're looking for something a bit fancier, the Radisson Hotel Brunei Darussalam is a solid choice. We like to use Booking.com because we get a small discount and other perks like free breakfast with our Genius Level 3 status.

Packing essentials

Pack light, breathable clothing (it’s super humid!), but keep things modest. You will stick out like a sore thumb wearing shorts but it’s fine cause you’re a tourist and locals won’t care. But better to opt for a loose shirt rather than a sleeveless top. Bring sunscreen, insect repellent, and, if you plan to explore the rainforest, a good pair of walking shoes. 

Money matters

The local currency is the Brunei Dollar (BND), and it’s pegged to the Singapore Dollar at a 1:1 rate. Credit cards are accepted in most places, but carrying cash is always handy, especially at night markets and smaller shops. ATMs are easy to find, so no need to stuff your socks with cash. To give you an idea: USD $1 convert to around 1.4 Brunei dollars.

Language

The official language is Malay, but English is widely spoken, especially in hotels and tourist areas. Still, learning a few basic Malay phrases will earn you some smiles.

Travel worry-free!

Don't skimp out on your travel insurance: make sure your trip is fun, frivolous, and free! Most importantly, good travel insurance will cover you for loss from petty theft, medical emergencies, flight cancellations, pricey hospital bills, car rental protection, and more.

We recommend reading our article about the importance of travel insurance so you can assess which policy is best for you.

Read more travel adventures like this in our book!

We've published our very own gay travel book called, ‘Out in the World'. It has all our practical safety tips, first-hand advice, and travel stories from some of our favorite destinations.

We hope it inspires you to have a fun and safe trip!

Click on the book to order:

For more inspiration:

• If you will be also heading to Malaysia, check out our gay guide to Kota Kinabalu
• For more great destinations in the region, here's our gay guide to the Philippines
• Find out which are the most gay-friendly countries in Asia
• Definitely don't miss our gay guide to Thailand, which is easily one of the most gay friendly countries in Asia
• And our gay guide to fabulous Bangkok, Thailand's capital city